Men, my dear, are very queer animals—a mixture of horse nervousness, ass stubbornness, and camel malice.

Cows are among the gentlest of breathing creatures; none show more passionate tenderness to their young when deprived of them—and, in short, I am not ashamed to profess a deep love for these quiet creatures.

Of all the creatures that breathe and creep on the surface of the earth, none is more to be pitied than man.

There be beasts that, at a year old, observe more, and pursue that which is for their good more prudently, than a child can do at ten.

Man is no man, but a wolf, to a stranger.

The fox knows lots of tricks, the hedgehog only one—but it’s a winner.

A good dog, sir, deserves a good bone.

Alas! We are ridiculous animals.

The elephant, although a gross beast, is yet the most decent and most sensible of any other upon earth. Although he never changes his female, and hath so tender a love for her whom he hath chosen, yet he never couples with her but at the end of every three years, and then only for the space of five days.

Man is the only animal that laughs and weeps, for he is the only animal that is struck with the difference between what things are and what they ought to be.

I hate the sight of monkeys; they remind me so of poor relations.

In every man is a wild beast; most of them don’t know how to hold it back, and the majority give it full rein when they are not restrained by terror of law.

Man is a noble animal, splendid in ashes and pompous in the grave.