Every man sees in his relatives, and especially in his cousins, a series of grotesque caricatures of himself.

Men are what their mothers made them.

By and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class.

It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.

In peace, children inter their parents; war violates the order of nature and causes parents to inter their children.

Motherhood is the strangest thing, it can be like being one’s own Trojan horse.

The strength of a family, like the strength of an army, is in its loyalty to each other.

Again, men in general desire the good, and not merely what their fathers had.

Few sons are equal to their fathers; most fall short, all too few surpass them. 

The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is intended—and not to take a hint when a hint isn’t intended.

A Jewish man with parents alive is a fifteen-year-old boy, and will remain a fifteen-year-old boy till they die!

Mother died today. Or maybe it was yesterday, I don’t know. 

To be a successful father… there’s one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don’t look at it for the first two years.