To live on a day-to-day basis is insufficient for human beings; we need to transcend, transport, escape; we need meaning, understanding, and explanation.

Alcohol is the monarch of liquids.

Abstainer, n. A weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

Drink does not drown care but waters it, and makes it grow faster.

If you were to ask me if I’d ever had the bad luck to miss my daily cocktail, I’d have to say that I doubt it; where certain things are concerned, I plan ahead.

I have sometimes thought that the laws ought not to punish those actions of evil which are committed when the senses are steeped in intoxication.

Sex and drugs and rock and roll.

That which the sober man keeps in his breast, the drunken man lets out at the lips. Astute people, when they want to ascertain a man’s true character, make him drunk.

Life isn’t all beer and skittles, but beer and skittles, or something better of the same sort, must form a good part of every Englishman’s education.

I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.

There are two things that will be believed of any man whatsoever, and one of them is that he has taken to drink.

Drugs, cataplasms, and whiskey are stupid substitutes for the dignity and potency of divine mind and its efficacy to heal.

A man who exposes himself when he is intoxicated has not the art of getting drunk.